13-May-2005

Finding it hard to get motivated today. I’m starting to realise that the task I’ve been assigned is too much for me to do alone in the time allotted, but no one else is lining up to get involved. ;I don’t know, I’m just feeling a serious lack of motivation in general. Just not that excited about anything. Don’t feel like I’m accomplishing anything in my life right now. I’m in one of those moods where I feel like my life is in a holding pattern . It’s not the first time I’ve felt this way, and it won’t be the last. I’ve got more reasons to be down than I do to be up, but I just have no incentive to change the status quo. Ugh… gotta change that soon. I just wish there was something I could do that was more … concrete.

Either way, I’m leaving for Houston tomorrow morning. I was thinking of cleaning up my place for mom, but I think I’ll just wait for her to get here so she can help. Yeah, I’m a bad son. ;

On a side note, when I was playing frisbee on Tuesday, the fiancee (Melissa) of one of the guys (Michael) joined us. Now, she’s an attractive girl, but she’s engaged, therefore she loses her gender in my eyes. However, what was funny was how rough she was playing. She was more physical than most of the guys. Early on, she decided that she was going to mark me during the game. It might have been a random decision, or it might have been because she identified me as the weakest link on ;my team. Irregardless, she kept running into me and knocking me away as we were chasing the frisbee. There was absolutely no holding back, and nothing lady-like about it. ;When she had the frisbee and I was blocking her, she’d put her hand on my chest and push me back. And I’m thinking, ” This isn’t fair. I can’t do the same thing to her .” Now, if she’d been single, I might have said something or done something
Yeah, right!
Shut up, inner voice!!… ahem, like I was saying, I mighta tried something, but she was obviously off-limits. It was just… odd. I decided to trash talk her instead, and it was working a little bit. Kinda funny, actually.

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