Archive for July, 2004


July 24, 2004

So I’m sitting here at work, waiting for the clock to wind down so I can go home, and I thought I’d update my blog.

Been thinking about marriage recently. My cousin Hemal (mom’s brother’s son, so we’re first cousins) called yesterday, and told me that his younger brother Saurabh (26 years old) has decided on a girl, and they’re looking to get him engaged within a month, with a marriage set for December. Hemal himself is communicating with a girl his parents introduced him to, and they’re kinda pushing on him to get a move on as well.

I guess all of this has gotten me to thinking about the whole process. Just so you know, I am not immune to it. When my parents were here, they mentioned two separate girls who they had heard about. One is back in India, and is the daughter of *takes a deep breath* my mom’s brother’s wife’s brother. The other one is in the US (somewhere in Texas, I think), and is related to a family friend in the Bay Area. Mom actually sent me a photo of the first one (and no, I won’t post it) a while ago. Anyway, their main point was that I should at least consider it, and initiate some form of contact with one of these girls if I was interested. They just couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t even entertain the notion. And it was hard for me to explain it to them.

One could make the case that all my parents are doing is introducing me to someone they think I might be compatible with, then letting me take it from there. I tried to tell them that it’s not so simple. See, it’s totally different when a friend introduces me to a girl (which hasn’t happened as often as I’d like… in fact, I don’t think it’s ever happened. My friends are selfish bastards. ) and when my parents introduce me to a girl. If a friend introduces me, his/her only hope is that I get along with the girl, and maybe something will happen in the future. With my parents, there’s always going to be the thought in the back of my mind that their ultimate goal is marriage. When they introduce me to a girl, they do so hoping that I will like her enough to want to spend my life with her. And that’s the kind of expectation I don’t want to deal with, at least not yet.

I’m not against the idea of arranged marriage per se. In fact, I might blog about that sometime later. My main concern is that I’m far too young to even think about wanting to get married now. I guess the most interesting part for me is that when I was with Keran, all I could think about was us spending our lives together. But I wasn’t even 18 then. Today, I realise that I want to experience more of life before I take on the responsibility of sharing my life with someone. I’m not saying marriage is bad. It’s just such a huge lifestyle change, and I want to make sure I have no regrets because I got married too early and couldn’t do stuff I wanted to do.

This doesn’t mean I don’t want to enter a committed relationship. Far from it. If I meet the girl tomorrow that I’ll want to spend the rest of my life with, I’ll ;be happy. ;But I guess I ;just want to take my time. ;Also, with Keran I’d put myself in the situation where she was ;my one single source of happiness, and that sucked because it just made things difficult for the both of us. I never want to be in that situation again, and I especially don’t want to put anyone else through that again, because it just wouldn’t be fair. I guess I’m finally starting to reach a stage (still a long way to go) where I want to be with someone, but I can be by myself.

That last line was deep, so go back and read it again.

And for those of you who are reading this and disagreeing with anything I’ve written… shut up.



July 20, 2004

Lewis Black on Homeland Security:

“It’s unbelievable. Homeland Security is a problem because, ; it’s a good idea but it’s a problem because the man who runs it is Tom Ridge, and he is someone who has the leadership qualities of a gerbil.

He was a part of coming up with what is the color coding system of security… you know, orange and yellow and whatever the fuck the others are… and what’s stupid about it is that they have to color code it, like we’re in FUCKING ELEMENTARY SCHOOL! There’s no need for that. Because every time they tell us what the color is, then they have to fucking explain it, so get rid of the fucking colors!

Simplify it. There should be three levels of security:
1) Jesus Christ
2) Goddamnit
3) FUCK ME!!


I’ll write more later…


July 17, 2004

Another long stretch between messages, and easily the most eventful 11 days I’ve had since joining Xanga. No, I can’t get into details. But suffice to say, it wasn’t boring.

Had my wisdom tooth extracted today. It was coming out crooked, and was creating a food pocket. Dentist gave me a local anaesthetic, and slowly pried the thing out. Luckily, it came out in one piece, root and all, so there was no need to go back in and dig it out. Right now, I’m sitting at home with a bunch of cotton stuffed in the gap to stop the bleeding. I can’t wait to see what it’s gonna feel like when the anaesthetic wears off.

Work’s been going well. I’ve started getting stuff to do, so I’m not randomly walking around anymore. I’m getting to learn more and more about the stuff I’m doing, and the people around me, and it certainly looks interesting. Let’s see how things go.

I’ve realised what it is that sucks about this forum. Because people know who I am, and they know that I am writing this, I can never be totally open and honest about the stuff that’s going on in my life. That tends to kinda dampen any enthusiasm that I might have about updating the blog site. I want to keep this thing updated, but I don’t know what the point is anymore. We’ll see. I’m a stubborn guy.

Me and the YJA crew went to Lake Tahoe last weekend, to celebrate the end of the convention. It was fun. We rented a 10-person speedboat. Samir gunned the throttle, while the rest of us stood up in the front and got drenched with the spray from the lake. It was awesome! Then a few of us went horseback riding, and it was quite underwhelming. Now I love horses. But our “riding” consisted of us each on a horse, following a guide (also on a horse), and we walked up a trail, and down a trail. The area was dusty, dirty, with only one spot where we could actually see any natural beauty. And there was lots and lots of horse poop. The biggest bummer was that there was no flat region for us to actually ride the horse. Only once, towards the end, did the horses actually start trotting. Overall, it was definitely not worth $30. I’ve had more fun riding horses on Juhu Beach in Bombay. Then we went to the casinos, and I lost $100 at the $10 Blackjack table, which was about what I had planned for. Overall, we had a lot of fun, and I definitely want to go back to Tahoe again.

God, that last paragraph just seems lame. I guess I’m not feeling particularly inspired today. Maybe next time…


July 6, 2004

And it’s done. 6 months (15 months for other people) of planning, weekend meetings and conference calls, and it’s all done. There were glitches and problems, but I think most people there had a good time. And I know some people had a really good time. Alas, I was not one of them. Not to say I had a bad time. It’s just that, being a Board member, I was constantly running around and couldn’t really take the time to chill with the attendees for too long. As for getting some action… well, I got a phone number, as well as the promise that she’d call. That’s about it. Let’s see…

Otherwise, it’s been an interesting past few days. I might write more detailed entries later on about stuff that actually happened, but right now I’m late for dinner with a friend.